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Why knowing your “normal” could save your life As part of Bowel Cancer Awareness Month, this special bonus episode of Two Women Chatting explores one of the most important health conversations right now: the rise of Bowel Cancer - especially in younger people. Michelle is joined by Dr Anisha Patel, a GP, author, and bowel cancer survivor who was diagnosed at just 39. As both a doctor and patient, she shares expert insight alongside her personal experience of diagnosis, treatment, and recovery - offering practical advice on symptoms, screening, and prevention. What is bowel cancer? Bowel Cancer (also known as colorectal cancer, colon cancer, or rectal cancer) affects the large bowel and is one of the most common cancers in the UK. While it has traditionally been associated with older adults, recent research shows a worrying trend: 👉 bowel cancer rates are rising significantly in people under 50. Why are bowel cancer rates increasing? According to recent data, bowel cancer cases have risen sharply over the past 25 years. Dr Anisha explains that while known risk factors include: * Low fibre diets * Processed and red meat consumption * Obesity and inactivity * Smoking and alcohol There are also emerging factors being studied, including: * Gut microbiome changes * Ultra-processed foods * Early antibiotic use * Environmental exposures In many cases - including Anisha’s - there are no obvious risk factors, making awareness even more critical. Bowel cancer symptoms: what to look out for Recognising the early signs of Bowel Cancer can save your life. Dr Anisha shares a simple acronym to remember the key symptoms: B – Blood in your stool or when you go to the toilet O – Obvious change in bowel habits (diarrhoea, constipation, urgency) W – Weight loss without trying E – Extreme tiredness L – Lump or persistent abdominal pain If you experience any of these bowel cancer symptoms for more than three weeks, it’s important to speak to your GP. Why early detection of bowel cancer matters Early diagnosis is one of the most important factors in bowel cancer survival. * When caught early, survival rates are over 95% * Screening can reduce the risk of dying from bowel cancer by around 25% what your bowel looks like In the UK, NHS bowel cancer screening kits are sent to people aged 50 and over. These at-home tests are quick, simple, and potentially life-saving. Yet many people still avoid them due to embarrassment or misunderstanding. The message is simple: do the test. A doctor’s experience of bowel cancer Despite being medically trained, Dr Anisha Patel did not initially recognise her own symptoms. Her signs were intermittent and easy to dismiss - something many patients experience. She was eventually diagnosed with stage 3 bowel cancer and underwent major surgery and chemotherapy. Her story highlights a key point: 👉 bowel cancer does not always fit the stereotype. You don’t have to be older, unwell-looking, or “high risk” to be affected. Life after bowel cancer One of the most overlooked aspects of cancer is what happens after treatment ends. Dr Anisha speaks candidly about: * The physical and emotional impact of recovery * Living with long-term side effects * The mental health challenges of survivorship * Rebuilding identity, confidence, and normal life Her advocacy work and platform @doctorsgetcancertoo have helped raise awareness and support others navigating similar experiences. How to reduce your risk of bowel cancer While not all cases are preventable, there are steps you can take to reduce your risk: * Increase fibre intake (aim for 30g per day) * Eat more whole foods, fruit, vegetables, beans, and pulses * Reduce processed and red meat * Stay physically active * Maintain a healthy weight * Limit alcohol and avoid smoking * Take part in screening when invited Fibre, in particular, is one of the most important - and often overlooked - protective factors for bowel health. The most important takeaway: know your normal If there’s one message from this episode, it’s this: Know what’s normal for your body - and act if something changes. Whether it’s bowel habits, energy levels, or unexplained symptoms, early action can make all the difference Listen to the full episode 🎧 This powerful conversation with Dr Anisha Patel is available now on Two Women Chatting. You can listen on all major podcast platforms. Apple Podcast - Spotify - Amazon Music 📣 Please share this episode during Bowel Cancer Awareness Month - raising awareness could save a life. Useful resources Dr Anisha Patel @doctorsgetcancertoo Bowel Cancer UK https://www.bowelbabe.org

If you’ve ever wondered why ADHD is suddenly being talked about so much among women in their 40s and 50s, you’re not alone - and this powerful episode of Two Women Chatting goes right to the heart of it. In this special conversation, GP and women’s health expert Dr Helen Wall joins Michelle to unpack ADHD in midlife , why symptoms often magnify during perimenopause and menopause, and why so many women are being diagnosed only now - or beginning to suspect ADHD for the first time. We explore the overlap between hormone fluctuations , executive function struggles , and the daily pressures of being in the sandwich generation , plus how years of masking have hidden ADHD traits in plain sight. Dr Helen breaks down what ADHD really looks like in women, why it’s often misunderstood, and how understanding your brain can be genuinely life-changing. This blog includes the full transcript of the episode, offering practical advice on recognising symptoms, navigating diagnosis, making the most of GP appointments, and celebrating the strengths and superpowers that come with an ADHD brain. If you’re curious, confused, or on your own midlife ADHD journey, this is the perfect place to start. Full episode is available on all podcast platforms or click here . Dr Helen Wall Today on To Women Chatting we're diving into a topic that feels very close to home to me, ADHD in midlife women… and I couldn't think of anyone better to help unpack it than Dr Helen Wall. You might recognise Helen as one of TV's favourite doctors, as resident GP for BBC Breakfast, BBC Morning Live and a columnist for Women Magazine. She's a women's health specialist and an all-around voice of sense and science when it comes to understanding how our hormones, brains and busy lives collide. Now if you've been around here a while you'll know I was diagnosed with ADHD a few years ago so I'm on this journey too juggling menopause, midlife, motherhood and about thousand open tabs in my brain. So in this episode we're going to talk about what ADHD can look like for women later in life, why so many of us are only getting diagnosed now and how to manage the overwhelm with a little more self-compassion and maybe a little less caffeine! Let's just say if you've ever walked into a room tripped over your suitcase from the holiday you returned from a week ago, find that you're doing the same wash multiple times over because you've forgotten to put it in the dryer and your time blindness is an inside family joke. This episode is for you! And here is Dr. Helen Wall. Welcome to the show. Dr Helen Well thank you for having me here and that's a brilliant segue into exactly what we'll be talking about today. Michelle It is, you are so passionate about this, aren't you? What draws you so much to this particular area? Because you are a GP, so you cover all parts of medicine, menopause as well, but so frequently you post about this and you're passionate about raising awareness, aren't you? Dr Helen Yeah, I mean I've always had an interest in women's health. did actually apply for run through training to be an obstetrician gynaecologist and I was actually very heavily pregnant with my first child then and decided to go into general practice. So although I love being a GP, that love for advocating for women and making sure women get the right care that they need has always been there. I think that probably stems back to my mum who was a midwife and I grew up obviously with her having that same passion. yeah, every time I've done anything in my career as a GP, it's always drawn me back into working to advocate and help women get the right care. And it's such a frustrating area of medicine that women don't get the care that they need and there's still so much disparity and inequality I feel for women in medicine. That's something that I'm really passionate about trying to change. It's a huge, huge thing to change, but little by little, things like this, we can all do a little bit to do that. I've got a particular interest in ADHD. My daughter, who's now 17, has a diagnosis of that. I recognise many of these traits in her, and I started to see it quite commonly in my menopause clinic that I run, an NHS menopause clinic for our primary care network, I started to see women that I just thought there was something else going on here and started to recognise traits that I'd recognised in my daughter and vice versa. I became a bit passionate because I didn't want my daughter to get to the point of being in midlife, having missed opportunities, having felt that she'd struggled all her life to get to the point where she suddenly had a light bulb moment and everything imploded. So that's where that sort of grew from really, wanting to get things better for women. Michelle I think a lot of people have heard now about neurodivergence, you know back in 30 years ago when women were going through menopause it wasn't talked about it, wasn't really recognised so can you give me a brief 101 on what ADHD is Dr Helen Well, it's a neurodevelopmental disorder. And I think that's a really key  point that we need to make here, because I think there's a lot of hype around at the minute about it being a trend and about it, there being no test for it. So therefore, people just jumping on the bandwagon and people are describing symptoms that everybody's got as having ADHD. And it's absolutely not that. We've got really, really clear evidence that there are functional and structural differences in the brains of those people with ADHD, so how the brain looks and how it works in terms of the neurotransmitters and the chemical messengers and how they function. And we've got evidence that there is genetic predisposition and certain gene loci, so parts of genes that lead to neurodivergence, in particular ADHD and autism.  We have real evidence that this is a real thing that exists but despite that we're still getting particularly women told that they've not got ADHD and that they're overthinking things and it's just part of growing up it's just part of menopause and so on and that really really grates on me . Michelle Me too. That gender bias is so, it's still enormous, isn't it? Because, you know, traditionally we thought of little boys jumping up and down on sofas and being sort of slightly out of control as being ADHD. But little girls were so often told to sit still, be quiet, behave. And that masking behaviour, we've carried that for decades. Dr Helen Wall So let's switch quickly because there is so much ground I need to cover with you. Why are women now starting to get diagnosed in midlife? Dr Helen Well, I think for things like this, really, I think we're talking about it a lot more. And I think something that has changed in the last couple of years is we've actually started to look at how female hormones impact the female brain. It's absolutely ludicrous that in 2025, I'm sitting here saying, but in 2023, there was the first study done that looked at how female hormones can impact on our brain, for years. I went to medical school, I did lots of GP training, I've worked in medicine for 20 years and we never talk generally day to day about the fact that oestrogen and progesterone affects how a woman's brain functions, it affects how she thinks, it affects the ability for her to process information, to retain memories, to you know get up and go. All of these things are driven by chemical messengers like for everybody but also by our sex hormones and the first study was done in 2023 looking at how hormones impacted menopause, so why do women become depressed, anxious, etc. Why do they get brain fog in perimenopause and menopause? And then they started to link it back to, actually because our sex hormones are starting to fluctuate or dip. I think from that we've got to extrapolate that into all different aspects of medicine, including neurodivergence. really escalating information and research now to show that those drop-in fluctuations in our sex hormones impact how the brain works in neurodivergence as well as the general female brain. And I think once you get a movement going and people start to talk about these things more, exactly what you're doing here today, which is fantastic by the way, people start to think, women start to think, hang on a minute, I'm not just ditzy or lazy or disorganised and actually there's something else going on here.  Numerous women and people contact me day in day out on my Instagram channel about the fact that they've struggled all their lives yet seemingly been perfectly in control, they've got good careers, they've managed a household, a family. To the outside world, they look like they've been flying but the cost of that, the internal cost of that is so great that those women often end up burnt out, tired, exhausted, and just everything imploding once our hormones start to fluctuate and deplete in perimenopause. Michelle it's almost like a perfect storm, isn't it? So we're coming to midlife, we've got different kinds of concerns. We might be changing careers or feeling that those menopause symptoms impact our work life. We might have elderly parents as well as adult kids to worry about and care for. And we might have partners that perhaps we, know, the silver divorce is huge. You know, we might be finding that we're tracking differently in relationships. Dr Helen Yes. Michelle So all of a sudden we've got this hormone dip and in a way, as you said, it's that burnout. We can't take it anymore and something's got to give. Dr Helen It's the perfect storm, isn't it? It's that perfect storm of everything lining up. We often talk in medicine about the Swiss cheese model. I'm sure other industries talk about it as well, where everything just lines up.  Each of those things on its own wouldn't lead to a complete catastrophe. But once you line all those things up, you're just heading to a really dark place. women have been doing that. People say to me, well, why has this suddenly happened now? Why are we suddenly diagnosing this now? It's not because it's new. I don't truly believe that the number of women with ADHD has risen in the last two, three, four, five years. I think we've empowered women to recognise it and start to talk about it and start to ask for help more and that's why it's gone up considerably. And it needs to continue to go up because I believe there's still a considerable number of women who are suffering and struggling in this space but haven’t got a clue what's going on for them and I hear from those women day in and day out on my Instagram channel. Michelle You know, in a funny way. I could almost equate it to the Esther Rantzen effect of Childline, that there were always kids being abused, but they didn't know how to let people know. Now we've gone through menopause as well, where, as a female community, we've really gathered together and raised awareness and shared symptoms. Now we're onto ADHD. And I agree with you, I think we've always had it, but we've managed those symptoms and now the overwhelm is so much. We’re now at a point where because our parents are living longer. A generation ago, sadly, those parents probably wouldn't be around now. So we wouldn't still be sandwiched right in the middle of both those things. Dr Helen Let's not forget, we're not that far away from when women couldn't get a mortgage on their own without permission from their father or their husbands. I think I read, I think it was what, 1997 or something ridiculous like that. I can't remember the year now, but I remember thinking I was a teenager at the time. It wasn't that far along ago, but actually now women are working in the workplace like men work in the workplace. We're running a home where we're literally doing everything. This is not me slagging off men, but we've added on that right to be in leadership roles, in work, running successful businesses, et cetera, that maybe women weren't doing as much even a generation ago and that adds a lot of pressure. So we're doing all these things, we're living longer. So I think years ago when women used to go into perimenopause and menopause,that was sort of a signal that they were coming towards the end of their life really - women lived to what, 50s, 60s? Now women are living into their 80s. We're spending half our lives not having been through perimenopause or menopause. So it's a significant chunk. And as you said, parents are living much longer. People may have had children later on. So they've got teenage children who are also hormonal when they get to that point in their life. It is just an absolute, yeah. Michelle That is an excellent point Helen because we used to have kids in our 20s and now so many of us are having kids in our 30s or even 40s. So you know in the normal order of things back in the day by the time your daughter was 23 she would have moved out and had kids and that would not be your responsibility and, sadly, your parents may not be with you but also you are not thinking at the age of 50 let's do a career pivot let's start an Etsy shop or let's let’s,train as a nutritionist because that's been my passion all my life. Now we are literally looking at halfway through not halfway done and thank goodness we are starting to provide support and recognition. Let's have a look at some of the symptoms that are typical of ADHD and maybe particularly typical of midlife women if you can share some of those. Dr Helen So I think you mentioned earlier, didn't you, about masking? And masking is a huge thing for these women. You know, the symptoms that they've had have often not been the typical. Even I've got colleagues now who still think that ADHD is about being impulsive, about running around the classroom throwing chairs. Actually, a lot of the symptoms for women, particularly women who've got to this point and not been diagnosed, have been internalised . So they've been those things of constantly sort of having been struggling to process, to switch tasks, to keep on task and so on, but internalising that in terms of worry, anxiety, feeling like they have to mask to seem that they are on top of things, but actually having to prepare a lot for everything that they do. So I had one lady say to me that if she went to a meeting, she was a very high flying businesswoman, but she would prepare for three hours for one business meeting and she would be up to 11pm/midnight just to do that because she wanted to go into that meeting fully informed and fully on top of everything but she couldn't trust herself to be able to do that in the moment. She had to have everything completely prepped because the cognition and her pathways in the brain couldn't process that information quickly enough and a lot of the symptoms that women have are more of that thing really that preparation, brain execution, rather than the impulsivity. And if they do have impulsivity and hyperactivity, it tends to be very internalised. So it's that unable to switch off, unable to rest, fidgeting, getting in bed at night and not being able to stop that mind turning . I'd be interested to hear what symptoms you had, Michelle, and what led you to sort of think. Michelle I'm glad you mentioned that because I think this is another reason that women my age are starting to get diagnosed is because we're looking at our kids differently.  So our kids are coming through school and it might be flagged up that their behaviour could be ADHD or neurodivergent, which is what happened to me. I had a lot of guilt actually because when my daughter was seven, eight, nine, ten, she had a very high IQ. That came through in her academics but she was so scatty. There wasn't a week that went by that she didn't lose something, forget her homework, find quizzes and tests really difficult, getting things done in order. We didn't know what that was. And she was diagnosed with auditory processing disorder. Later on, as she became 18, 19, 20, and I think this happens a lot when kids go to university and you lose that kind of helicopter parenting because we're still there as a support network. When they're on their own, it kind of implodes a little bit because they've got to be an adult in an academic situation. And she didn't do that great. She managed to get through. Now when I look back, I am unbelievably proud of how she managed to navigate that process without meds, without diagnosis - and it was after she went to university, we did suggest maybe she should maybe just go and chat to somebody. Let's see… Sure enough, she was diagnosed as ADHD. And as I did a podcast on this, this is four years ago when I first started Two Women Chatting and I got an expert in to talk about it, about adult kids. I'm like, hello, are you talking about her or me now? What is going on? And isn't it though? So then you start looking at yourself and thinking, gosh, apple and tree. This is extraordinary. Dr Helen Yes, that's so common. Michelle But I also feel like you mentioned right at the beginning there, the hopping on the bandwagon, the trend. It's almost embarrassing to then go and say, I wonder if I've got it too. Because my family did react like, here we go, Mum. Yeah, yeah, you as well. Definitely. They're used to it now and they accept it. But that feeling of being gaslit or will my doctor just dismiss it as menopause? Let's go down that route, shall we? Because the mix up between is it perimenopausal or menopausal symptoms at our age? We don't know. How do we recognise whether it's more than that? Dr Helen Yeah, it's super hard and this is something I talk about a lot on my Instagram channel. It's hard for women to decide what's going on. What I always say is, if you have ADHD, that's not just appeared in perimenopause and menopause. That might be when you recognise it or when people around you recognise it. But actually, if you sit down and really think, which can be hard for someone with ADHD,I get that! But maybe don't sit down. Maybe walk about and really think about your childhood and how you were in your teenage years. And often at each point for women, when the hormones dishevelled a little bit. So often we will notice a distinct bit of unravelling, as I like to call it, around puberty and then perhaps when they've had a baby. And then again, when they hit perimenopause because it's that impact of those hormonal fluxes, that impact on brain chemical messaging but usually the symptoms or always the symptoms should have been present at least from under age 12 . Sometimes I'll say to women have you got any old school reports because they might not remember what was said but actually if you trace it back really carefully you can usually see if you speak to family speak to mum dad they'll always have just put it down nine times out of ten to she was just scatty she lost everything all the time. S he couldn't sit and take anything in. She couldn't process information, but that was just her. And it's not been recognised as an actual thing.  It's just been labelled as something that you do and your personality. But actually, if you link it right back and go right back to childhood and then through your teens and into adulthood, you'll start to piece together where things perhaps didn't quite fit. And what women will often say to me is, I've never really felt normal. I've never really felt, I've always felt there's something different about me or I've never really understood why I couldn't do that easily like everybody else. There's always some kind of little thing that they say that just sort of stabs you in the heart but then you think, gosh, why have we missed this for so long? That was the real thing that I didn't want my daughter to have to go through, moving forwards in life because I'd seen it in so many women. But I have to hold my hands up and say I'm not perfect.,.  I'm registered menopause specialist now, but I wasn't then. And I've probably missed it in lots of women. And, you know, I'm not proud of that, but  it's about being open and honest and saying, it's okay that we've missed it in our patients, but we need to change that moving forwards because things do need to change. I think I've probably also got a little bit of ADHD. People say, well, everybody's got a bit of ADHD, but, we recognise it in our children. I know -and I certainly have recognised traits in my daughter, in myself. You know, everybody's journey is different, isn't it? I'm not in a place where I want to go down that road of being diagnosed, et cetera, but I understand why some women do and we need to accept that everybody's an individual and we need to do what they need for that support. Sometimes it's not about jumping on medication it's just about getting that validation of why you struggled for so long, why you've had to over prepare for everything, why you've constantly felt restless and let's talk a little bit about that rejection sensitivity dysphoria  that women get because that is huge isn't it and the emotional turmoil Michelle Yes, please. It's massive! People don't understand how awful that is, how you always feel. I've had this podcast for four years and people say, you've done really, really well. I'm like, no, not really. But everything is magnified to a degree that you think, someone, especially with social media. my goodness. It's awful. Click to pre-order - published May 2026 Dr Helen Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And I think we need a whole new term for ADHD for women, if I'm honest. I think attention deficit hyperactivity disorder just does not, it does not show what's on the tin at all. Not what's in the tin, is it? You know, it's completely different for women. It's often not about attention deficit. It's about attention difference.  Often they've got very good attention for some things and absolutely no attention for others. But for women, the huge part of ADHD is that emotional dysregulation.  And that gets ever more difficult when our hormones go into flux. So in puberty, when we've had a baby, when we are in perimenopause and menopause, we already know, because of what I was talking about before with the effect of hormones on our brain, that hormonal flux impacts our brain in terms of anxiety, memory, brain fog, depression. And when you've got ADHD, those things are already challenged because your dopamine levels are often not functioning well or not being read properly or lower than the normal. And the estrogen impacts that as well. So things definitely go into spiral. And emotional dysregulation is a huge part of that. And I think we don't talk about that enough and the impact that that has. Michelle Do you think that's why so many people who later discover they've got ADHD may have been either dismissed by their GPs or just offered antidepressants because it kind of shows itself in a sadness or a not fitting in or can't put my finger on it kind of thing? Dr Helen Yeah, absolutely and one of the things I always say to GP colleagues, and I'm a GP trainer as well so I try and drum this into my GP trainees, is treatment resistant depression and anxiety we shouldn't yes okay we might change with anxiety and depression you have to start one medication change to another and so on but if a lady is coming back to us time and time again - I've had ladies that I've seen where they've been in and out with anxiety and depression throughout most of adult life from teenage years and they've never got better. Why have they not got better? And often it's because we've not got the root cause. So I'm not saying that you can't have anxiety and depression if you've got ADHD. You absolutely can. The two can coexist. But what I am saying is what we're not very good at is looking at why is this person not getting better with the treatment? What else is going on for this person? And sometimes, very often in fact, there's an underlying neurodivergence that's been missed or not recognised and that person has therefore been treated with medication for anxiety and depression. Some of that may be absolutely right because we know that if you're neurodivergent you're more at risk of becoming anxious and depressed because of the struggles of living in a world that is forcing you to be neurotypical effectively and the brain differences that happen.  But we shouldn't just be reliant, we shouldn't just be labelling those people as that without looking at what else is going on for them. Michelle It would be a good thing at this point to mention that there's emerging evidence that ADHD people react differently to medications. So what might work for a non neurodivergent person might spiral somebody else. Can you just talk a little on that? Dr Helen Yes, there is very much emerging evidence about the way that our or people with ADHD and neurodivergence of their enzymes work, the way the brain reacts to medication and you know we see this particularly in hormones as well so I talk quite a bit about progesterone and how women with underlying neurodivergence often react very differently to them. That's the same for many medications, particularly medications that affect our GABA receptors. Our GABA receptors are those receptors that are our calming receptors. So that's the receptors that if you take a sleeping tablet or you take a relaxant like Diazepam, Valium, or you have that glass of wine when you're really stressed on a Friday night, it hits those receptors and you just feel that first dull of calm. We know that those can vary in women who are neurodivergent and therefore, we really should be looking a bit closer at how we manage these women with different medications and the same with antidepressants, but unfortunately we don't really have the guidance on that because the studies and the evidence is just really coming to the surface. It's certainly not something that we think about in day-to-day clinical practice. I'm not going to sit here and say that I can change women's medications based on me knowing that they're neurodivergent because we just haven't got the information to do that. What I can say is that I can be very mindful of the fact that they may not react how we expect them to and things may not pan out as we expect them to. So I often try and set that expectation and have a very reassuring threshold for tweaking and tailoring things and not being too disheartened when things don't go to plan and that's all we can really do I think at this point in time until that research becomes more and then it gets embedded into clinical guidance and practice. Michelle Now some women are quite fearful about going to their GP for a diagnosis in case they're not  ADHD. There's that hypersensitivity again, we're going to get rejected, we haven't even got the ADHD that we thought we did. But of course, you know, there's so many kids who are in line trying to get ADHD treatment. The NHS is overwhelmed with helping cases and I don't know if they do it on a priority basis, kids first, women later. But because of waiting so much and potentially worried about getting rejected, lots of people are self-diagnosing. And I think this adds to the, ‘everyone's got a bit of ADHD', everyone's jumping on the trend. It's not necessarily that. What is your ‘doctor take’ on going the self-diagnosis route, at least to start with? Dr Helen I really advocate for that. I call it self-identifying as ADHD and I think it's something that we should be encouraging women to do because not every woman is going to want or benefit from medication. So I think you have to weigh up for yourself what are the benefits of me getting a formal diagnosis here. So sometimes women want a formal or need a formal diagnosis because without it they're not going to feel validated, they're not going to get the support from their family and friends, from their workplace. They're going to want medication which you absolutely can't get without a formal ADHD diagnosis and even then as you've said it's a struggle. But I think if you are somebody who is genuinely really struggling and have struggled throughout life there are so many resources out there that you can access without a formal diagnosis of ADHD. There's so many support groups, there's online resources on places like ADHD UK, Facebook groups, you can really tap into quite a wealth of support from other women who are going through the same. And I think there's no harm in doing that. fact, I think it's quite beneficial to do that if you're not somebody who is needing that necessarily, formal diagnosis. And even if you are somebody that's going for that, we know that the wait times are so lengthy now that doing that in the meantime can be quite helpful - just to get that support because it's a lonely, lonely place I think for women and they need that support. Michelle It really is and I feel like if you are going for that self diagnosis and you can start putting practices in place and advocating for yourself and honestly giving yourself permission to fail sometimes. One of the things that I think having the diagnosis has done for me and for many women I know with ADHD is having that label that makes them feel like they're seen, that they're not stupid, disorganised, lazy, any of those things that you can be so self-critical about or have from partners, families, like laughing at you.  I cannot tell you how many events and concert tickets, I still regret the Robbie Williams concert back in the 90s that I missed! I realise now that that I've given myself permission sometimes, if my social battery wears out and things like that, we're so much more aware post pandemic of how throwing ourselves into social situations does drain our batteries and now if I've got several events during the week I think no I'm going to need a day off where I can lay on the sofa and play Candy Crush Saga and it's alright because I'm going give my brain a little bit of a break and it has helped me operate better - so from that perspective I would encourage anybody even if it is to find out that you're going through perimenopause or menopause and maybe there's things that could help you through HRT or natural remedies or exercise. I think fundamentally we need to be kind to ourselves and allow ourselves to diagnose whatever is making us feel like something's ‘off’. Dr Helen Yeah, absolutely. It's that self-compassion, isn't it? And that permission to rest and that permission to care for yourself. And I think so many women are bad at that generally, whether they've got ADHD or not. think we run around, don't we, looking after everybody else, trying to be perfect, trying to be on top of everything. we've got to, in general, think women are bad at giving themselves that space, but particularly women with ADHD who've spent their life trying to stay on top of everything and keep up with everything and then hit this period of their life where the hormones go into flux. It's so disabling for them. I've actually got a book coming out next year about this and it talks about that very thing about how we, it gives you some tools and tips on how to sort self-identify and really sort of tap into just doing exactly what you said, just looking after yourself and getting the most out of yourself and your brain really. Michelle I’d like to end on a really uplifting note because one of the things I think about ADHD and we can bandy around the words like superpower  but a lot of creative people have it and a lot of people in emergency situations are remarkable in those times. Kate Garroway has just admitted that you know she's just done celebrity traitors and she is now pursuing an ADHD diagnosis after talking to Cat Burns who is very open about her autism and her ADHD, Martine McCutcheon, Nadia Sawalha, Denise Welsh. I could go on and on about a number of celebrities who are thankfully giving their voice and admitting that they've got ADHD. I think it's a really good thing. So I personally feel like I can lean into creativity. I really feel like being neurodivergent has given me the edge on thinking beyond laterally. I can get a problem, I can get into it and I can come up with odd, different solutions to how I either solve it, promote it or get people on my show and I, I never stop. So let's talk a little bit about the upside of having ADHD . Dr Helen There's so many upsides, aren't there?  I read once that they thought originally it was some kind of evolutionary benefit having ADHD, that the people that were neurodivergent actually were the people that survived best in the wild, because of that ability to sort of not stop, not rest, just get on and see problems and often people with ADHD, women with ADHD particularly, but people with ADHD are often very emotionally intelligent and intuitive and they can read a room and they can read a situation. I've seen that to be true in so many instances. I got a message from somebody who's on Instagram and it said, you know, I've been told I can't have ADHD because I've got a successful career and I've never been in trouble with the police as a teenager. I mean, what an absolute load of rubbish. Some of the most successful people I've met have got ADHD or are neurodivergent in some form or other because they're just so driven and intuitive and they just get on with things and they can hyperfocus and just achieve and create and drive forwards and you know the energy that they often exude is second to none. So I think you know it's not a problem having ADHD if you're allowed to live with ADHD rather than try and live in a neurotypical world and be forced into those pigeon holes that you necessarily don't fit into.   So I truly believe it's the society around us that causes the issues with ADHD and particularly women with ADHD, not actually the ADHD itself. The problem that we've got is that we're not very good at supporting women or enabling them to get that support because for so long we've covered it up and just allowed women to mask and headlong into burnout and that needs to change  and doing things like this is the exact reason why I'm doing that because I think together we can help make that change. Michelle There is a reason why GCHQ, the house of spies if you like, actively recruit people with neurodivergence because of their problem solving skills. One last thing actually Helen, when people go to the doctor, they've got a short amount of time, how can they maximise the time that they've got to try and get some help? What should they do in advance? Dr Helen I would definitely recommend that you do a screening test for ADHD. It's a really crude measure. You can find it on most ADHD websites, ADHD UK, there's one on there. It's a crude measure and it doesn't give you the full picture, but it just enables the GPs to focus their mind. I would go with information about not just the symptoms you've got, but how it has affected you. So if you feel like you've been masking, actually talk about the cost of that masking and the fact that it might look like you've got a good career and you've done all these things and it doesn't look like it, probably have. But the cost of that and the internal restlessness and burnout that that's caused and I would try and link that back to childhood if you can because the GP will be looking to see that this isn't something that's just happened in perimenopause, menopause or post-childbirth or something, it's something that's been neurodevelopmental and throughout the life course so you need to provide a little bit of information about that. I always say this to people and I completely understand how this happens. I'm very pro advocating for women and women with neurodivergence and if I see a lady who doesn't know that and she comes in to see me, often they come in very defensive and expecting a fight basically and that can be really hard dynamic then to come back from in a consultation. I think try and park every dismissal, everything you've had. I know this is really hard and it's easy for me to say one side and go in with a fresh mind with the information you've got and have a clear ask that you want to be referred for X, Y or Z or you want to be, you you want to have a look at your menopause or whatever and go in fresh and open and give the GP a chance because I think sometimes it's hard when people have seen other GPs or with the healthcare pressures or they've had problems from family who've dismissed them and they come in and they're very argumentative and on the attack and the consultation just spirals nowhere. So that would be my best advice just to go in open-minded with the information with a clear ask for what you want and if you don't get what you want and you d on't get where you think you need to be then it's absolutely fine to go to go again to a different GP. Don't feel that you have to write that off. You can keep going and ask for a second opinion. You can do that with anything. Michelle and use the resources that are out there. Your Instagram channel is brilliant. You've pinned up some really, really wonderful explanations of how people should go about getting that diagnosis, what they should be looking for and how they should keep records. Michelle I would really, really advocate for women if they are feeling like they need to get that diagnosis. Don't be put off by the imposter syndrome, the ‘I'm going to be rejected’. It is weirdly empowering just to know, not to like shout it from the hilltops. It's your private information but it might just help you deal with the burnout, the constant juggling, just so much that goes on in midlife. Helen, thank you so much for joining me today. You've been really, really informative. Thank you. Follow Helen on instagram @doctorhelenwall or take a look at her website www.tvhealthdoctor.com Helen’s book Menopause and ADHD: How to navigate hormone flux and neurodivergence  will be out in May 2026. Pre-order here What ADHD Looks Like in Midlife Women Why Hormones Make ADHD Symptoms More Noticeable How to Prepare for an ADHD Appointment The Positives and Strengths of an ADHD Brain Why ADHD in Women Is Not a Trend Some excellent resources and instagram accounts: ADHD Love - just the best explanations in a really warm way Alex Partridge podcast and instagram @adhd_chatter_podcast ADHD Women's Wellbeing podcast and instagram NHS ADHD in Adults link ADHD UK Adult Self Screening Tool link

Number 1 -  I am not a menopause expert (far from it) - but I have gone through it (and out the other side!) and I’ve been lucky enough to to meet and learn from everyone on this list - so I trust them and can recommend them.  But please  do your own research, keep those symptom trackers, advocate for yourself and seek support. Number 2 - this is not an exhaustive or complete list.  There are many many fabulous experts and meno-warriors out there that can help - doctors, coaches, nutritionists, wellbeing experts, healthcare professionals, fitness and exercise coaches. If you listened to my recent Brooklands Radio show dedicated to Menopause Awareness Month , you’ll know how passionate I am about cutting through the noise and menowashing to share genuinely useful advice from trusted experts. After the show, so many of you reached out asking for the resources I mentioned - so I’ve pulled everything together here in one place. Whether you’re in perimenopause, full menopause, or supporting someone who is, this guide is designed to help you feel informed, empowered, and less alone. You’ll find links to expert podcasts, the HRT prepayment certificate, symptom checkers, charities, and menopause organisations I genuinely trust - plus a few of my favourite reads from brilliant women like Kate Muir, Kate Rowe-Ham, and Mariella Frostrup. Because knowledge really is power - and when we understand what’s happening to our bodies, we can make the right choices for our health, our future, and our joy. Trusted Experts Dr Juliet Balfour @menopausehealth Dr Nighat Arif @drnighatarif Dr Naomi Potter @dr_naomipotter Dr Shahzadi Harper @drshahzadiharper Dr Rachel Hines @drrachelhines Trusted instagram accounts/influencers/platforms Jane James @janemhdg - founder of community Facebook page Menopausing and Me with Davina McCall Libby Stevenson @libbystevenson.wellbeing Claire Hattrick @theexecutivemenopausecoach - Menopause in the Workplace Zaowoman - Judith Sprusz - @menopausehealth - education, health coaching and hormones Meera Bhogal @meerabhogal Laura Dowling @Fabulouspharmacist Dr Claire Kaye Career and Confidence Coach Dani Binnington - Menopause and Cancer Kate Muir - @menoscandal menopause campaigner and film-maker (documentary with Davina McCall) Carolyn Harris MP - an incredible supporter of women's health and chairs the All Party Parliamentary Group for Menopause. You can contact her here: carolyn.harris.mp@parliament.uk Michelle Griffith Robinson - Olympian, life coach, women's health advocate Emma Bardwell - nutitionist specialising in women's health and menopause - author of The 30g Plan Great books and author instas great menopause books Owning Your Menopause - Fitter, Calmer, Stronger in 30 Days - Kate Rowe-Ham How to Menopause - Tamsin Fadal Have a Magnificent Menopause - Alison Bladh How to Have a Magnificent Midlife Crisis - Kate Muir Meno-Wars - Fiona Clark The Natural Menopause Method Cookbook - Karen Newby The Feel Good Fix - Lavina Mehta MBE Menopause Yoga and Wellbeing - Petra Coveney Midlife Matters - Katie Taylor @loungelatte Menopausing - Davina McCall and Dr Naomi Potter Cracking the Menopause - Mariella Fostrup and Alice Smellie The Definitive Guide to the  Perimenopause and Menopause - Dr Louise Newson Useful podcasts - they’ve helped me :) T T wo Women Chatting - of course! These episodes in particular: Kate Muir | Midlife Unflitered: Menopause, Mind and Magnificence - click here Kate Rowe-Ham | Own Your Menopause, Fuel Your Power - click here Jenny Eclair | Life After Menopause - click here Emma Skeates | Menopausal Madness - click here Menopause Part 1 - click here Menopause Part 2 - click here Owning Your Menopause with Kate Rowe-Ham Is It Hot in Here - Dr Naomi Potter No Appointment Necessary - Dr Amir Khan and Cherry Healey The Laura Dowling Experience - Laura Dowling So, let’s talk meno-washing . You’ve heard of greenwashing - when brands pretend to be eco-friendly while wrapping everything in plastic? Well, meno-washing is the midlife version. It’s when a company suddenly decides it’s “menopause-friendly” … usually around October… and slaps the word “meno” on absolutely anything.I’m talking menopause toothpaste  (because apparently, your gums need empowerment?), menopause tea  that’s just chamomile with attitude, or the classic “hormone-balancing candle” - like that’s going to regulate your oestrogen! Even workplaces do it - posting about “supporting menopausal women” on social media while keeping the office at 22 degrees and offering zero flexibility or understanding. So here’s the rule: if it doesn’t educate, empower, or genuinely make your day easier - it’s probably meno-washing.Stick with the experts and brands who actually care, not just cash in. If you pay for NHS prescribed HRT medicine 3 or more times in 12 months, an HRT Prepayment Certificate   could save you money. Each item on an NHS prescription usually costs £9.90. You can buy an HRT PPC for a one-off payment of £19.80 (the cost of two single items). Doesn’t cover testosterone though - go to NHS.com  to complete https://health-charge-exemptions.nhsbsa.nhs.uk/buy-hrt-ppc/start And while we're here... getting that glue off from all the patches? Try Nudi spray . Spray on, wipe off. (not an ad and not on commission!) The Stats One study found 25% of women  have “severe symptoms” that significantly impact daily life. On average, symptoms persist for about 4 years  post-period—but in some cases can last up to 12 years . A major UK survey of women aged 40-60 in employment found 73%  experiencing menopausal symptoms. In that same group, 67%  say their symptoms have had a mostly negative  effect on them at work.  Around 10% of women  have left the workforce because of their menopause symptoms. 27% of employed women aged 40-60  say menopause symptoms negatively impacted their career progression — that’s an estimated 1.2 million  women in the UK. Congratulations to the Menopause Mandate for pushing through their MM40plus campaign that has now resulted in menopause being included in the NHS over 40 health check.  Mariella Frostrup and Carolyn Harris have spearheaded the campaign. “Including menopause in the NHS 40+ health check will help millions of women make informed choices about their symptoms and treatment” says Mariella, Chair.  Wes Streeting, Secretary for Health announced the news today. This follows the findings of Menopause Mandate’s 2025 Mega Survey, which gathered responses from more than 15,000 women, and confirmed its previous yearly findings.  If you don't get asked to come in for a 40+ healthcheck by your GP practice, ask them for one! There is no single number for menopause symptoms , as sources cite varying amounts, from over 30 to more than 70, with some lists identifying as many as 62 or 76. These symptoms are often grouped into categories like physical, psychological, cognitive, and sexual health. Symptoms can include common ones like hot flashes and mood swings, as well as less-known effects such as changes in body odor, tinnitus, and electric shock sensations.  Common and widely cited: There are frequently cited lists of around 34 symptoms, which include hot flushes, night sweats, and mood swings.  Other widely recognized symptoms: Other commonly recognized symptoms include joint pain, headaches, changes in skin and hair, trouble sleeping, and brain fog.  Lesser-known symptoms: Some sources identify a much larger range of symptoms, sometimes exceeding 60 or even 70, which can include a wide array of physical and psychological effects. These can include things like:  Changes in body odour  Worsening allergies  Electric shock sensations  Tinnitus (ringing in the ears)  Dry, itchy eyes (which water a lot) Bleeding gums and metallic taste in mouth Irritability and anxiety  Fatigue  Driving anxiety Vertigo and dizziness, clumsiness Download a menopause symptom checker here The Menopause Charity is for all women and other individuals experiencing menopause, as well as their employers, partners, families, friends, and the health professionals supporting them. Some great TV shows that might help: Davina McCall: Sex, Myths and the Menopause - on Channel 4 Davina McCall: Sex, Mind and the Menopause - on Channel 4 💬 Keeping It Real (aka The Disclaimer Bit): Just so we’re clear - no one’s paid me to be here! Every expert, resource, and recommendation I’ve shared in my Midlife Toolkit - Menopause Edition is something I genuinely rate and trust. I’m not a medical expert (though I’ve read enough about HRT and hot flushes to qualify for an honorary PhD in peri-chaos). These are simply the things, people, books and podcasts that have helped me navigate this wild midlife ride. Please, always check with a qualified healthcare professional before making any decisions about your health - Google and I don’t count!

Guides We've made up some useful downloadable guides about some of the topics we've mentioned on the podcast. Check them out below: Empty Nest 101: A Parents' Survival Guide It's not always easy to have your child go off to leave the nest. Download this helpful guide before your kids leave - and have some really important chats!

Michelle's Book Club TWC has welcomed celebrities, experts and authors to the podcast. If you want to read more, here's an easy way to track down their publications. Now, in partnership with Brooklands Radio , every month Michelle picks a new book of the month to share with listeners and followers - plus a weekly radio segment on Thursday afternoons at 2pm recommending a fiction or non-fiction book and, occasionally, a podcast or audiobook - featuring authors on air to chat about their books. Listen to Brooklands Radio on DAB, on smart speaker, via the app or online at www.brooklandsradio.co.uk . If you miss Book Club on Thursday afternoons, you can download and listen to the Brooklands podcast here . Subscribe to newsletter here In partnership with Brooklands Radio Michelle's Book Club every Thursday at 2pm Book Club Titles March Book Choice When I Kill You by B A Paris AUTHOR ON AIR INTERVIEW ON BROOKLANDS RADIO COMING 19 MARCH 2PM Nell Masters is certain someone is following her. The hairs on the back of her neck rise when she travels to and from work, there are silent calls to her office, and a huge bouquet of flowers arrives without a card. And Nell has a reason to be looking over her shoulder, because she has a secret that she’s hiding from everyone in her life, including her new partner, Alex. But Alex also has secrets of his own. Fourteen years earlier, when Nell went by the name Elle Nugent, she witnessed a student, Bryony Sanders, getting into a stranger’s car. When Bryony was found murdered, Elle became obsessed with finding the person responsible. She was convinced she knew who it was and her fixation with Brett Parker, the man she accused, led her down a dangerous path … Now, Nell tries to convince herself that this unnerving feeling of being watched is all in her mind. Has someone from her past discovered her new identity? Has the stalker become the stalked? Or is there something even more deadly at play? Author chat - from 20 March Buy When I Kill You Brooklands Radio Book Club - authors on air Podcast Guest Publications click on image to buy Kate Rowe-Ham The Longevity Solution In a world obsessed with quick fixes and fad trends, this book offers something different: a science-backed, habit-focused framework rooted in real-life results. Drawing on years of experience as a women's fitness coach, Kate blends expert knowledge with the latest research to create a holistic programme that addresses the key pillars of longevity - movement, mindset, nutrition, and community. Alex Partridge Why Does Everybody Hate Me? Alex draws on his own experience of RSD, and shares how it's coloured every aspect of his life, from his days as founder of the global social media content brands UniLad and LadBible, to his adult relationships, his mental health struggles and his terrible imposter syndrome. Elizabeth Day One of Us In this compulsive story of betrayal, old bonds and buried scandals, one British establishment family comes face to face with the consequences of privilege and the true cost of power. Martin and Ben were friends for decades — best friends, Martin would have said — before the terrible events at Ben’s 40th birthday party tore them apart. So when Martin receives a surprise invitation back into the inner sanctum of the dazzling Fitzmaurice family after seven years of silence, he can’t resist the chance to get his revenge. Donna Ashworth Loss: The New Collection: Words to weather the many waves of grief Losing someone casts us adrift in a lonely sea of grief, one that can be hard to navigate and is frequently overwhelming. Donna's wise words help us feel less alone on even the hardest of days, and bring comfort and understanding. She also gently reminds us that love and grief are two sides of the same coin, and that great grief is born only of great love. Podcast Guest Publications click on image to buy Anthea Turner How to Age Well Anthea has written her own book on how to look great as we age, complete with her own tips and hacks and the expert advice she has received over the years. How to Age Well: The Secrets is a carefully researched, beautifully presented guide to ageing with style and grace. Anthea, who is renowned for her own glamorous look, has spoken to the experts for their tips and secrets – so you don’t have to. Anthea Turner & Wendy Turner Webster Underneath the Underground The first in the Mice series: It is two weeks before the King's Coronation and the British Asian Mice at Hounslow Underground Station are planning a fabulous party to celebrate. But disaster strikes when a huge glitter ball spins around and fails to shine! There's panic all round until clever mouse, Mo Low, has a fantastic idea - to take back the famous Kohinoor diamond from the Royal Crown and return it to the Indian community where it belongs! Judy Murray The Wild Card Twenty years ago, Abigail Patterson put her promising tennis career on hold to have her baby son, Robbie. But after a wild card entry to Wimbledon, she suddenly finds herself swept up in a world she thought she'd left behind - and against all odds, she's winning! Yet as those long-buried dreams of lifting the sparkling silver trophy on centre court inch closer, Abi knows that it's only a matter of time before the press start digging into her past and uncover the secret she's kept hidden for so long. Pauline Cox Eating for good health, happiness and hormones It's time to reset your hormones. What we eat matters. This ground-breaking cookbook with 100 simple, delicious and affordable low-carb recipes, will give you everything you need to balance your hormones and optimise your health for good - at any stage of your life. Women are increasingly suffering from a hormonal rollercoaster. From tricky puberty to endometriosis, mood swings or PMT, anxiety and adrenal fatigue, low fertility, poor sleep and tummy fat, plus many challenging menopausal and perimenopausal symptoms - this book is the solution to freeing yourself from the hormone trap.

If you would like to find out more about the Two Women Chatting Podcast guests,you can explore more here. Some of our recent podcast guests Tamzin Outhwaite on sisterhood and self-discovery Stella Rimington on being former head of MI5 and writing espionage thrillers Prue Leith on dignity in dying and confidence in colour Kate Rowe Ham on future proofing your health Susan Saunders on boosting brain power Suzy Reading on quality sleep tips Jessica Buchanan on kidnap and resilience Donna Ashworth on the power of words Sue Cleaver on pro-ageing Dilly Carter on decluttering Cherry Healey on midlife manifesting Jenny Eclair on life after menopause Bonnie Langford on returning to Doctor Who's Tardis Sally Gunnell on Midlife MOT Rosie Nixon Say Hello to Kindness Michelle Elman on people pleasing and setting boundaries Jane Michell on the obesity crisis Laura Hamilton on travel inspiration Tracey Davies From midlife mum to stand up comedian Emma Skeates Emma Skeates Menopausal Mayhem Pauline Cox on gut health Michelle Griffith Robinson on being the sandwich generation and managing expectations Sami Wunder on midlife dating Alice Beer Midlife Financial Planning Andrea McLean on loneliness and reinvention in midlife